In 1978, my father and I engaged in an animated debate on a car ride home. Amazingly, it was about Iran.

What was amazing was who was on what side.

At the time, Mohammad Reza Pahlavi was Shah of Iran. He had been a strong ally of the United States for more than 25 years – ever since the U.S. and Britain engineered the coup that toppled an elected prime minister in 1953.

But there was growing opposition to Pahlavi from various groups within Iran. Some sought democratic reforms. Others sought to turn Iran into a religious state – a la Saudi Arabia except for Shi’ite Muslims instead of Sunnis.

Pahlavi’s ruthlessness worsened as he struggled against opponents. And his use of imprisonment, torture and murder became the subject of a “60 Minutes” piece – a reminder in this sad age of how powerful good journalism can be.

Dad – who would be best described today as a moderate – was mortified by what he saw. And when something bothered him that much, he was almost evangelical on the subject.

So why were we debating?

I – supposedly the wide-eyed liberal idealist – said that while I agreed that the Shah was a horrible human being, what would we be getting if he just left? Would there be a nascent democracy? Or would the religious fantastics – led by the exiled cleric Ayatollah Khomeini – turn Iran into an even worse place?

Dad thought it didn’t matter. Torture is evil. Anyone who tortures the people he supposedly leads doesn’t deserve to lead.

He was adamant. And it turned out Jimmy Carter, a strong advocate for human rights, kind of agreed with him. The United States withdrew its support of Pahlavi, who fled the country. 

But it was Khomeini and the fanatics who took control. And it has been a mess ever since.

A mess that has entangled the United States more than once since 1979. Of course, most famously, soon after Khomeini took power, with what we call the Hostage Crisis. American diplomats held by Iran for more than a year after Pahlavi was allowed to be treated for cancer in New York.

The closest we’ve come to reconciliation was late in Barack Obama’s presidency. His team – with the help of Europe, China and Russia – got Iran to agree to repurpose its nuclear development away from weapons in return for the release of assets frozen during the Hostage Crisis.

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The name “Iran” is supposedly derived from the Persian word for “Land of the Aryans.”

Unfortunately, the definition of the word “Iran” in the United States and much of the West is “oil.”

There are lots of places in the world with which this country has had fraught relationships. We seem to be able to leave Vietnam alone after fighting against its interests for about 20 years. 

But the problem with Iran is all that oil. It’s one of the biggest pools of black gook in the world. 

And they don’t want us to have it.

It has a lot to do with the fact that we’ve thwarted their efforts at controlling their destiny in the past, and they don’t trust us not to do it again.

Like Trump did last weekend.

There’s some fantasy that Iranian protests against Ayatollah Khamenei, the brutal leader taken out in the initial attack, meant that the Iranian people might see us as liberators.

Mazharf. That’s the Persian word for baloney.

The Iranians have no reason to trust us. They don’t want us in their lives. And this war we’ve started – whether it’s already ended or drags for months – won’t change any of that. We’re not getting their sweet, sweet oil – which we really wouldn’t need if we committed ourselves to a clean energy future, but that’s another issue.

They, like my Dad did, have long memories. Torture leaves a scab and the U.S. has been picking at it for all of my nearly 72 years and more. 

This time, in fact, we didn’t just pick at it. We amputated it.

It’s not unfathomable that we will end up devastated by this. The Iranians are perfectly capable of inflicting pain on us – now or years in the future.

Ultimately, my father was on the right side of history. Even if the ayatollahs were vicious, hateful men, they were Iranians. It was up to Iranians to decide how to handle this. 

And now, who knows?