One of the tenets of MAGAism is that their opponents haven’t actually read the Constitution of the United States.

If they did, they “reason” (that’s not a word easy to apply to these people) that we’d all understand why women and people of color should be second-class citizens, immigrants have no business being here and everyone should arm to the teeth.

So, let’s take them up on the challenge. And because people tend to stop reading after the top of the page – especially when a document is started in 18th century English – let’s start from the bottom. With the last six amendments to the Constitution, numbers 28 to 23.

— 28th Amendment: Equality of rights under the law shall not be denied or abridged by the United States or by any State on account of sex. The Congress shall have the power to enforce, by appropriate legislation, the provisions of this article. This amendment shall take effect two years after the date of ratification.

Here’s the first bone of contention.

What’s commonly known as the Equal Rights Amendment was supposed to have been approved by three-quarters of the state legislatures by 1982. It came up three states short by the deadline. But since 2017, three states – Nevada, Illinois and Virginia – have voted to ratify.

After the 2024 presidential election, Democrats pushed to have President Biden declare that the amendment was ratified. They were not acting without legal support – the American Bar Association agreed that the amendment could be enacted. Even after the deadline – and even after six states changed their mind and voted to rescind ratification.

Biden sort of said “Why the hell not?” and declared the amendment ratified, especially given the two-year clause for taking effect had passed.

He knew that the idea that men and women are equal under the Constitution – something not specifically spelled out in the 237+ years prior – would piss the hell out of Trump and the pet rocks who support him.

The idea of ignoring deratification has precedent. Southern legislatures tried to do that with the 13th and 14th Amendments, the ones that abolished slavery. For once, the Jim Crow types lost – those rescinding moves were ignored.

Ignoring the seven-year deadline for ratification is another matter. It isn’t part of the amendment’s text (READ THE CONSTITUTION!), so whether it has standing is in dispute.

My thought here is this: After all the unchecked actions taken by Trump in the first three weeks of this debacle, it’s pretty rich for the right to complain about something Biden declared following approval by the requisite 38 states. 

Best of all, if you happen to be a woman who disagrees with my position, your rights are protected under this 28th Amendment.

— 27th Amendment: No law, varying the compensation for the services of the Senators and Representatives, shall take effect, until an election of Representatives shall have intervened.

The only people I can imagine opposing this are those who sought Congressional seats to make bank from the public payroll.

Basically, nobody in the current Congress – the 119th – can collect on a vote to raise their pay until the 120th. And that’s after the people of their state or district have a chance to consider whether that pay raise is a good idea.

— 26th Amendment: The right of citizens of the United States, who are eighteen years of age or older, to vote shall not be denied or abridged by the United States or by any State on account of age.

This amendment passed just in time for me – I turned 18 the year after its ratification and voted for the first time in the 1972 New York presidential primary.

No amendment has been ratified faster than the 26th. That’s surprising, because its adoption came at a particularly fraught time – in the midst of all the protests of the Vietnam War and during the administration of Richard M. Nixon, who was not perceived as the kids’ choice.

Opponents thought 18-year-olds were too immature to pass judgment on civic matters. There was just one problem with that – they certainly appeared to be mature enough to die in a Vietnamese rice patty.

The 26th passed with widespread support in both parties. There are many on the right who would like to take that back. 

Good luck with that.

— 25th Amendment: In case of the removal of the President from office or of his death or resignation, the Vice President shall become President. Whenever there is a vacancy in the office of the Vice President, the President shall nominate a Vice President who shall take office upon confirmation by a majority vote of both Houses of Congress. 

Whenever the President transmits to the President pro tempore of the Senate and the Speaker of the House of Representatives his written declaration that he is unable to discharge the powers and duties of his office, and until he transmits to them a written declaration to the contrary, such powers and duties shall be discharged by the Vice President as Acting President.

Whenever the Vice President and a majority of either the principal officers of the executive departments or of such other body as Congress may by law provide, transmit to the President pro tempore of the Senate and the Speaker of the House of Representatives their written declaration that the President is unable to discharge the powers and duties of his office, the Vice President shall immediately assume the powers and duties of the office as Acting President.

Thereafter, when the President transmits to the President pro tempore of the Senate and the Speaker of the House of Representatives his written declaration that no inability exists, he shall resume the powers and duties of his office unless the Vice President and a majority of either the principal officers of the executive department or of such other body as Congress may by law provide, transmit within four days to the President pro tempore of the Senate and the Speaker of the House of Representatives their written declaration that the President is unable to discharge the powers and duties of his office. Thereupon Congress shall decide the issue, assembling within forty-eight hours for that purpose if not in session. If the Congress, within twenty-one days after receipt of the latter written declaration, or, if Congress is not in session, within twenty-one days after Congress is required to assemble, determines by two-thirds vote of both Houses that the President is unable to discharge the powers and duties of his office, the Vice President shall continue to discharge the same as Acting President; otherwise, the President shall resume the powers and duties of his office.

Troppe parole! They needed a lot of words to resolve what they saw as a complicated problem.

Here’s one simple thought:

Had Trump tried to stage the insurrection in December 2020 instead of January 6, 2021, there’s a good chance that last sentence would have been invoked by Trump’s cabinet. Starting with Mike Pence, who was the guy who the MAGAts wanted at the end of a rope.

It is clearly not going to be invoked by this bunch of pillbugs. And it certainly wouldn’t pass the muster of supplicants like House Speaker Mike Johnson and Senate Majority Leader John Thune.

The dolts in this cabinet are loyal to Trump. Not to the Constitution. There’s no provision in the 25th for the people of the country to attempt removal of someone as clearly unfit as Trump.

— 24th Amendment: The right of citizens of the United States to vote in any primary or other election for President or Vice President, for electors for President or Vice President, or for Senator or Representative in Congress, shall not be denied or abridged by the United States or any State by reason of failure to pay poll tax or other tax.

A lot of the MAGA types, when they tell us to READ THE CONSTITUTION, think that there’s some need to require voter ID to exercise your franchise.

The 24th Amendment can be construed as an answer to that. 

Poll taxes were imposed in the South as a way to restrict Black adults and less affluent whites from voting. There were also citizenship tests with really dopey questions aimed at frustrating people.

Can voter ID be construed as a poll tax? Yeah.

Voter ID is not free. It’s something like a driver’s license or a passport. You are requiring people to get these things whether they want them or not – and whether they can afford to pay for them or not. 

That applies to any other of the stupid rules being enforced by states like Texas, Georgia and Florida. They violate the 24th Amendment.

READ THE CONSTITUTION!

— 23rd Amendment: The District constituting the seat of Government of the United States shall appoint in such manner as Congress may direct: A number of electors of President and Vice President equal to the whole number of Senators and Representatives in Congress to which the District would be entitled if it were a State, but in no event more than the least populous State; they shall be in addition to those appointed by the States, but they shall be considered, for the purposes of the election of President and Vice President, to be electors appointed by a State; and they shall meet in the District and perform such duties as provided by the twelfth article of amendment.

Remember that whole thing about taxation without representation? Well, welcome to Washington, D.C.

Living in the nation’s capital doesn’t afford you the same rights as someone living in Washington, Illinois. You don’t have senators or a representative in the House. Your local legislative body has no power to change the Constitution. So laws in this country are made without your input.

Thanks to the 23rd Amendment, Washingtonians have some say in who lives on one of the biggest pieces of property in town. But they didn’t get that right until 1961 – for 174 years, they were completely powerless.

There’s one big reason why Washingtonians won’t get any more rights anytime soon. It’s the fact that 62% of the population isn’t white. That scares the hell out of people in the red states – imagine two more senators and one representative voting in the interest of people of color.

MAGA types talk about feelings of helplessness against the system. They don’t seem too bothered by the idea that there are Americans who are Constitutionally helpless against the system.

Admitting D.C. as a state or amending the Constitution to require representation are the only ways to right this wrong. That ain’t happening.