Just yesterday, some idiot congresswoman from upstate New York proposed making Trump’s birthday a federal holiday.

The cult is strong with her.

It’s strong with a lot of them. Trump supporters see the chaos, anger and dysfunction taking place and love it. Like it’s a twist in a strange TV series and they’re eager to see what happens next.

One wishlist favorite of the people who go around telling everyone to read the Constitution is the idea that an 82-year-old Trump can run for president again in 2028. 

So I’ll start part two of my bottom-up “reading” of the Constitution with…

22nd Amendment: No person shall be elected to the office of the President more than twice, and no person who has held the office of President, or acted as President, for more than two years of a term to which some other person was elected President shall be elected to the office of the President more than once. But this Article shall not apply to any person holding the office of President when this Article was proposed by the Congress, and shall not prevent any person who may be holding the office of President, or acting as President, during the term within which this Article becomes operative from holding the office of President or acting as President during the remainder of such term.

You don’t have to read past the first 14 words to know why the Constitution prohibits Trump from running for a third term. Maybe the proponents of such a stupid idea should, I guess, READ THE CONSTITUTION.

Now, I’ve been told that one way around this might be to have Trump run for vice president with some patsy at the top of the ticket. It could be Vance, whose photo alone would define “patsy” in a pictorial dictionary.

Then, the thinking goes, the chump would step aside and Trump legally gets his third term. 

I’m not sure that works – I’m not an legal expert or Constitutional scholar, but I would think there’s something problematic about that.

Actually, if Trump wants a third term, he’d just declare it, claiming Section II of the Constitution. We’ll get to that in time.

This amendment was enacted right after the death of Franklin Roosevelt shortly after he won a fourth term. Republicans were horrified by the idea of another wildly popular Democrat controlling the Oval Office until he wanted to leave. 

FDR broke a tradition, started famously by George Washington (See, going to see “Hamilton” would prove useful one day!) of only two terms.

Democrats supported the idea – maybe someone foresaw Reagan, who might have won a third term even with dementia, and Trump. But they made sure it didn’t apply to Harry Truman, the incumbent.

So forget the run-on second sentence – brevity is not a strong suit among legal types. Truman is the only person to whom that applied.

21st Amendment: The eighteenth article of amendment to the Constitution of the United States is hereby repealed. The transportation or importation into any State, Territory, or possession of the United States for delivery or use therein of intoxicating liquors, in violation of the laws thereof, is hereby prohibited.

The only way you can get rid of a provision of the Constitution is by an amendment repealing that provision.

If what Trump has tried to do with birthright citizenship was legitimate, FDR would have ended Prohibition by executive order.

As it was, the 21st Amendment getting rid of the 18th Amendment was pretty popular after the abject failure of banning booze. So Roosevelt was on pretty firm ground to let this repeal go the right way. Amazingly, Utah – not known as a haven for “intoxicating liquors” – is the state that made repeal effective.

Besides the fact that Prohibition was less observed than any law other than the one stopping you from tearing off a mattress tag, the 21st Amendment allowed states to ban alcohol on their own. Mississippi was completely dry for another 30-plus years.

20th Amendment: The terms of the President and the Vice President shall end at noon on the 20th day of January, and the terms of Senators and Representatives at noon on the 3d day of January, of the years in which such terms would have ended if this article had not been ratified; and the terms of their successors shall then begin. The Congress shall assemble at least once in every year, and such meeting shall begin at noon on the 3d day of January, unless they shall by law appoint a different day. If, at the time fixed for the beginning of the term of the President, the President elect shall have died, the Vice President elect shall become President. If a President shall not have been chosen before the time fixed for the beginning of his term, or if the President elect shall have failed to qualify, then the Vice President elect shall act as President until a President shall have qualified; and the Congress may by law provide for the case wherein neither a President elect nor a Vice President elect shall have qualified, declaring who shall then act as President, or the manner in which one who is to act shall be selected, and such person shall act accordingly until a President or Vice President shall have qualified. The Congress may by law provide for the case of the death of any of the persons from whom the House of Representatives may choose a President whenever the right of choice shall have devolved upon them, and for the case of the death of any of the persons from whom the Senate may choose a Vice President whenever the right of choice shall have devolved upon them.

In 2020-21, there were 78 days between Election Day and the inauguration of Joe Biden . That gave Trump and his henchmen a little more than two months to conceive and execute the January 6 plot to overturn the election.

Imagine if they had another 43 days to put things in place.

Or, this year, given how quickly they moved to rend the fabric of American democracy, if they had another 78 days to organize their bullshit.

The 20th Amendment moved Inauguration Day to January 20 to March 4. It also decided to make being in Congress more of a real job by making sure it met every year and started to work on January 3.

This amendment also tries to relieve some of the hypothetical havoc of what if something happens to the president-elect, vice president-elect or both.

There’s something simplistic about it, though – as if Congress is going to rise to the crisis and agree on an acting president. 

Good luck with that.

19th Amendment: The right of citizens of the United States to vote shall not be denied or abridged by the United States or by any State on account of sex.

American women did not fully have the right to vote until 105 years ago.

You would think it’s unthinkable to repeal the 19th. But some of the Againers in MAGA believe going back to a time before suffrage would create an American paradise.

Mark Robinson, the clown Trump supported to be governor of North Carolina last year, said in 2020, “I absolutely want to go back to the America where women couldn’t vote.” Then, Robinson posited, we could get the real change Americans need, which he believes is freedom from government.

Robinson’s not alone. There are several MAGA bros who think the women should shut up and let the guys decide how the world runs.

And while I concede that this is a distinctly small minority of the populace expressing such thoughts, I do notice that Trump won both his elections against highly more qualified women and lost to an exceedingly decent man.

The 19th Amendment might still be in effect. But the belittlement of thinking women continues uninterrupted.

18th Amendment: After one year from the ratification of this article the manufacture, sale, or transportation of intoxicating liquors within, the importation thereof into, or the exportation thereof from the United States and all territory subject to the jurisdiction thereof for beverage purposes is hereby prohibited. The Congress and the several States shall have concurrent power to enforce this article by appropriate legislation.

Apologizing to a liberal advocate for a scathing letter he sent her, former Wyoming Sen. Alan Simpson, a Republican, quoted a former Democratic colleague by saying “When I make a mistake, it’s a doozy.”

It’s hard for our times to conjure what a failure Prohibition was. It was an attempt by the center and bottom of the country to dictate morality to the rest of it.

The result was not a sober America. It was an America in which unregulated alcohol killed people. It was an America where people lost respect for the rule of law. It institutionalized organized crime. It destroyed honest family businesses that had been distilling or brewing for generations.

It should have served as a warning to future generations.

Instead, it seems that that America – a proven failure as shown by the 18th Amendment – wants to pull this kind of a stunt again. Banning abortion, or birth control, or IVF, or same-sex marriage, or recriminalizing marijuana will backfire in a godawful way.

Just like Prohibition.

17th Amendment: The Senate of the United States shall be composed of two Senators from each State, elected by the people thereof, for six years; and each Senator shall have one vote. The electors in each State shall have the qualifications requisite for electors of the most numerous branch of the State legislatures. When vacancies happen in the representation of any State in the Senate, the executive authority of such State shall issue writs of election to fill such vacancies: Provided, That the legislature of any State may empower the executive thereof to make temporary appointments until the people fill the vacancies by election as the legislature may direct. This amendment shall not be so construed as to affect the election or term of any Senator chosen before it becomes valid as part of the Constitution.

Until 1913, your state’s U.S. Senator was chosen by your state’s legislature. Marty Massachusetts did not cast a ballot for Daniel Webster. Kenny Kentucky did not check off the box for Henry Clay.

It was spelled out in Section I that senators weren’t directly elected. You could argue that your assemblyman voted in your interest when he (remember, our trip from bottom to top goes back in time, so the 19th Amendment hasn’t passed yet) cast his vote for senator.

But the problem was leaving it up to your assemblyman. He apparently didn’t agree with the guy your state senator wanted. And soon, Senate vacancies were taking an inordinate amount to fill, sometimes leaving states with no representation.

In addition, a Senate opening became an opportunity to make bank. Bribery and payoffs were widespread.

Of course, in the 21st century, we’ve evolved to the point at which money doesn’t control politics at all. Campaign spending is minimal. Ambassadorships and cabinet posts are awarded on merit, not on how much you contributed to a campaign.

And the moon is made of green cheese.