It’s September 4, 2015 and time once again for Friday Yes or No, my weekly attempt to be clever using just the words “yes” and “no.” (All right, there’s a bunch of words leading up to the yes or no, but let’s not nitpick.)

Q1: Did President Obama give what used to be Mt. McKinley in Alaska the Kenyan name for mountain?

A1: No

Q2: Is Kenyan a language?

A2: No

Q3: Did Barbara Mikulski give herself a great retirement gift by making the world a safer place this week?

A3: Yes

Q4: Will the picture of the body of a Syrian toddler washed up on a beach in Turkey begin to change people’s hearts about the refugee crisis in the Middle East and Africa?

A4: Yes

Q5: Is the Save The Children Web site a good place to send donations to help the thousands of children displaced by war? 

A5: Yes

Q5: Should anybody be surprised that Donny Trump is clueless about who’s who in the Middle East? 

A5: No

Q6: Is it surprising that a thought-to-be conservative judge is the one who put the Rowan County, Ky., clerk in jail for failing to license same-sex marriages?

A6: No

Q7: Is that because the definition of a conservative judge would be one who adheres to the letter of the law?

A7: Yes

Q8: Is there any good guy in this whole NFL-Tom Brady-deflated football mishegas?

A8: No

Q9: Does Scott Walker seem like the type of guy who has any patience for celebrating Labor Day?

A9: No

Q10: Should we really thank organized labor for the fact that we’re celebrating this Labor Day weekend?

A10: Yes!

1. It’s Wednesday, September 2, 2015.

2. Long Island is a stupid idea executed badly. It’s hard for me to think of anyplace else in the world where so many people have so few ways out, and all of them are so easily capable of malfunction.

This morning, it’s the Long Island Railroad, the nation’s largest commuter line. Because of an Amtrak power outage, LIRR trains can’t get into Manhattan — which is pretty much the point of the railroad. So commuters are either schlepping to Brooklyn and taking the subway into Manhattan, or driving.

The idea of creating a modern mass transportation system, instead of using one dependent on a lot of 19th century technology, just never occurs to people — except on days like this when you realize how stupid it is that there isn’t something better.

3. Conservative Republicans are determined to stick it to Planned Parenthood. In fact, they’re ready to shut down the government if the budget contains funding for Planned Parenthood’s women’s health initiatives.

The crazies have seen the videos convincing them that Planned Parenthood is using abortion as a profit center by processing fetuses for nefarious purposes. It’s not quite that way, but it doesn’t matter to these mouthfoamers.

President Obama has said he’ll stand up for what Planned Parenthood does to help women. The rest of us should do the same. There should be a price paid for jackasses who believe in punishing women for being women.

1. It’s Tuesday, September 1, 2015.

2. Even though it’s the month my son was born, I’m not a fan of September.

3. For the first time in my recollection, kids in my neighborhood are returning to school before Labor Day. I know that school reopens in August throughout a big chunk of this country — that’s been to our advantage when we’ve taken family vacations around this time of year.

But opening before Labor Day seems wrong — everybody’s going to be off Monday anyway. If this is a ploy for school districts to show how rigorous they’re making it for kids, it’s silly.

4. There was this great big full moon over the weekend, sort of like the one in the classic comedy “Moonstruck.” And, of course, full moons are often equated with craziness on the part of the human race.

But are the following things that have happened in the past few days examples of the moon’s influence or that we’re living in a time when idiots run free?:

5. Noted scaredy cat Scott Walker said he’s not satisfied with building a wall to keep out people from Mexico and points southward. He suggests the possibility of one on the border with Canada, to keep out Canadians and the evildoers they obviously harbor with their nationalized medicine and poutine.

Unfortunately for a guy who’s afraid to answer questions about whether or not he believes President Obama loves his country, there’s no wall or other barrier to stop Asians or Europeans, as well as various other forms of flora and fauna. But maybe that’s something we could work on if this country is stupid enough to elect a bozo like Scott Walker.

6. Chris Christie has an idea for keeping tabs on people who come to the United States. Have FedEx develop a system similar to the one it uses to track that “50 Shades of Gray” DVD you ordered from Amazon.

I wonder where Christie would put the barcodes needed to track those people. Maybe on their forehead. Or their butt. Maybe he could be a walking example of how that would work.

Or we could be more creative and make people who come to the United States wear silly hats, or strobing shirts, or some other idiotic idea that this clown might come up with.

7. President Obama, visiting Alaska this week, announced that he is changing the name of Mount McKinley, the tallest peak in North America, to Denali, the name given to it by the people who’ve lived there for millennia.

This has one Ohio congressman foaming at the mouth. This jackass says the people of Dayton are outraged, I tell you, outraged that Obama  would accede to the wishes of the folks who live near the mountain. He’s going to raise a big stink about it when Congress returns from its recess after Labor Day.

Because what America should really be concerned about right now is whether or not a mountain in Alaska is named for a president from Ohio — and not education, climate change, health care, infrastructure or any one of a quadrillion other things on this nation’s agenda. 

It’s August 28, 2015, and time for me to answer my own questions with my two favorite answers in the world.

Q1:  Can there possibly be anyone in the world who is surprised by Donny Trump’s boorish behavior?

A1: No

Q2: Is Serena Williams respected properly for the incredible tennis champion she is?

A2: No

Q3: Is it really possible that there were 1 billion people on Facebook one day this week?

A3: Yes

Q4: Is it a good idea when the stock markets are fluctuating wildly to keep close tabs on your investments?

A4: No

Q5: Was this week’s tragic slaying of two TV journalists a signal that the nation needs sensible gun control laws?

A5: Yes

Q6: Will there be any sensible gun control laws any time soon?

A6: No

Q7: Sophomoric though it may be, do I snicker every time I see the name Bimbo on a loaf of bread?

A7: Yes

Q8: Would I be snickering if I found a glass fragment in my loaf of Bimbo bread?

A8: No

Q9: Is there anything about the St. Paul’s rape case that doesn’t make a reasonable person ill?

A9: No

Q10: Was this week a reminder that we have to do better, much better, about overcoming evil and madness in our lives?

A10: Yes

1. It’s Thursday, August 27, 2015.

2. Remember Monday’s stock market crisis? That’s starting to seem a little silly, given today’s report that the economy has been growing faster than we thought.

3. I refuse to watch the video the deranged shooter made when he killed the TV reporter and cameraman. You should too. This sick, sick man wanted attention. Instead, celebrate the beautiful, if way too short, lives of his victims.

4. There’s a movement afoot to reform FAFSA, the form parents and students fill out for financial aid. One of the great reliefs of my life is that I never again have to do that. While I’d be intensely jealous of parents who wouldn’t have to spend the time I’ve wasted on those damn forms, civilization would certainly be better off with a little simplicity.

1. It’s Wednesday, August 26, 2015.

2. We’ll know all the details in time. But as I write this, it’s still pretty freaking bewildering that a TV reporter and her cameraman can be shot in cold blood at a Virginia shopping mall. My heart goes out to their families and to their colleagues — who, in a good newsroom, are family, too.

3. It’s hard to understand this. But then, it’s hard to understand why someone would shoot up a Connecticut elementary school or a Colorado movie theater.

4. It’s the 95th anniversary of the ratification of the 20th Amendment of the Constitution, giving women the right of the vote. I wonder if Fabulous Donny Trump thinks this amendment won’t stand up in court, either.

5. I don’t go around thinking about myself as a white male. But every time sound emerges from Fabulous Donny Trump’s mouth, I feel as though I need to apologize to friends and acquaintances who aren’t white, male — and stupid, I shouldn’t forget stupid. His campaign to rid America of what I imagine he sees as the Hispanic scourge is just plain embarrassing.

6. On the one hand, when you look at the video, it seems inappropriate for Univision’s Jorge Ramos to interrupt Trump’s news conference the way he did. But here’s the thing: The people most affected by his diarrhea of the mouth on immigration are being stoked by Trump. They’re scared and they’re angry and this jackass, who was glad to take their money when they came to his gaudy casinos, refuses to address them in a meaningful way. I understand Mr. Ramos’ frustration.

7. The solution to this Trump problem is simple. Register Hispanic voters and make sure they get to the polls.

If you’re a conservative Hispanic, who disagrees with me on every issue except this, register as a Republican and drive this guy out in the primary.

If you’re a Hispanic who shares my liberal views of the world, register as a Democrat and make sure Trump or whoever carries the banner of the party than enabled him is routed in a way that’s historic.

As is the case with the millions of other immigrants who have come to this country for 239 years, there are innumerable ways the United States a far, far better place because of people from Mexico and the rest of Latin America.

I think immigrants from Latin America should stay. I think Fabulous Donny Trump should leave.

1. It’s Tuesday, August 25, 2015.

2. It would not be surprising if the Philadelphia Phillies’ outfielders called in sick for tonight’s game against the Mets. They all must have sore necks from watching so many balls fly over their heads into the seats last night. 

3. Today is the 40th anniversary of the release of the album “Born to Run,” what Bruce Springsteen apparently thought was his last-chance power drive for greatness. Anyone who denies its masterpiece status is completely clueless, and even kids who might think of this as fuddy-duddy music still appreciate its craft and diligence. My K-pop, hip-hop loving son who groans whenever James Taylor plays in the car has been with me to two Springsteen concerts — and roared as first Clarence Clemons and then his nephew, Jake, hammered the “Jungleland” sax solo. 

4. Confession: I was the program director for WNUR, Northwestern’s radio station, when “Born to Run” was released in 1975.

In my progressive programming mind, there were two things wrong with the album. One was that it was over-hyped; Time and Newsweek had Springsteen on the cover the same week. Second was the fact that it was getting overplayed on a station whose philosophy was supposed to be not to play the same thing over and over.

So I hid the album in my office for a month. And, being 21 and a jerk, I returned it to circulation after playing it on my last DJ shift.

I’ve changed a lot in 40 years.

5. My favorite track on the album is “Meeting Across the River.”

One of the odes to the album’s milestone that has appeared today cites the line in “Jungleland” that could very well be the summation of the album: “an opera on the Turnpike.” “Born to Run” is an opera about growing up disaffected in a place that has seen better days.

And “Meeting Across the River” captures that tone beautifully, telling a story in three minutes and 19 seconds about two losers trying to perform some ethically iffy task without screwing it up again.

Added to the lyrics are the incredible piano and sax solos that gives it such a melancholy feel. 

6. In lots of ways, the issues that Springsteen tackled in “Born to Run” remain. The struggle of people working hard for a living who want a little something more, something that they see others have and just can’t attain.

The people who Springsteen sings about can go two ways.

They can give up and curse the powers that be. In 2015, alas, that’s manifested in the Donald Trump phenomenon. The strugglers succumb to hate and pettiness: someone else is to blame for their problems, and once we get them out of here, everything will be all right.

But there are people like Springsteen – trust me, he’s not alone – who understand the deck might be stacked but refuse to lay blame. They believe there’s a way for everyone to share in the bounty. We haven’t found it yet. But we shouldn’t stop trying.

For all the sketchiness of Springsteen’s Jersey Shore found in “Born to Run,” there are sounds of hope and love. Listen, because the story isn’t complete without them.

7. If today seems a little windy where you are, it might be because all those investors who watched yesterday’s Wall Street tumult are exhaling. There’s a rebound in the early going, and for some in the market it’s like a day at the outlet mall picking up bargains.

Just a reminder that markets go up and down, and up and down again. And usually, the long-term trend is up. Unless you bet on something crazy.

So, relax, have another cream soda, and enjoy this late-summer Tuesday. 

1. It’s Monday, August 24, 2015.

2. I’ve been ringside for several scary Wall Street days, so I’m a little jaded about today’s trauma. But only a little jaded. This is the first big sell-off since I retired, and I am counting on my 401(k) investments, now in IRAs, to sustain me and my family through what I hope is the next few decades.

So I understand how retirees who rely on fixed income and their savings might be a little scared this morning. We’re not sure we’re going to make it on what we have, and what he have is now is about 3% less than what we had at 9:29 a.m.

What you can do? Not much. The losses are lost. And unless it’s your business, trying to time the markets is a vexing game.

So, as someone I used to work with used to say in times of stress, have a cream soda and relax. If you don’t need the money today, tomorrow or in the next year, you’re fine. And if you need it that soon, given the sell-off in recent weeks, you’re still going to have about 85% of what you thought you had — and that’s probably more than you started with.

Markets go both ways, but the reason people invest in stocks is that, over time, they tend to be a better investment than bank accounts or any other place to park money.

My favorite cream soda is Dr. Brown’s, which is big in Kosher delicatessens around New York. A Dr. Brown’s cream soda, a nice lean pastrami sandwich on rye with mustard and a pickle, and making sure you’re not facing the CNBC screen at the deli, is a good way to spend this crazy Monday.

3. One other reason you shouldn’t worry is that the U.S. economy is pretty sturdy right now, as my former colleague Chris Isidore points out.

In fact, one of the factors in this sell-off is that Wall Street is worried that the Federal Reserve is about to raise interest rates for the first time since before the financial crisis. And the reason the Fed wants to raise interest rates is that the economy is doing so well that it doesn’t want it to get overextended, which would lead to problems.

This market meltdown could well delay the rate hike. But the fact that the Fed can consider a rate hike is a sign that things are OK, and should be taken as such by those of us who don’t make our living in financial services.

4. Of course, the sell-off could trigger problems in the economy as those looking to hire or start a business get cold feet, and people get nervous about making such key purchases as homes and cars.

But the stock sell-off is accompanied by a sell-off in oil. Gas prices, which were nowhere as awful this summer as in the past few years, are about to drop as vacations end and people go back to work and school.

That extra money in your wallet will help ameliorate any damage from falling stocks.

5. John Oliver is on a roll. Last night’s take on LGBT discrimination is good, although there was little chance he could top last week’s televangelism show.

Unlike the stock market, “Last Week Tonight” is taking the next couple of weeks off. It should be the other way around. 

It’s August 21, 2015 and time, once again, for Friday Yes or No, when I answer questions I ask with the shortest of answers.

Q1: Do you think it’s fair to say that the nation’s Hispanics might be more afraid of the forces being unleashed by Fabulous Donny Trump’s anti-immigration rhetoric than they are of ISIS or al-Qaeda?

A1: Yes 

Q2: Is it fair for these people to think of Donny as a terrorist?

A2: Yes

Q3: Should anyone with half a heart or an interest in justice spend a penny on a Trump-branded product or anything that accrues to Donny?

A3: No

Q4: Should the fact that I’m bigger and male than the two women graduating from Army Ranger school make me less wary of getting on their wrong side in some way?

A4: No 

Q5: Would it be nuts for Is Kim Jong-un nuts to drive North Korea to war with South Korea?

A5: Yes

Q6: For those of us preparing to live off 401(k)s in our golden years, does a stock market “correction” seem particularly correct? 

A6: No

Q7: While it’s nice that they’re in first place, and they still have an inside track to the playoffs, are the New York Mets going to torture their fans in the final six weeks of baseball’s regular season?

A7: Yes

Q8: Will the fact that July was the world’s hottest month since record-keeping began convince climate change deniers?

A8: No 

Q9: Has summer gone way too fast?

A9: Yes

Q10: Has anyone ever ordered a print subscription from a magazine’s Web site?

A10: No

1. It’s Wednesday, August 19, 2015.

2. It’s Bill Clinton’s birthday. It’s a real possibility that he’ll be a figure high in our consciousness for at least the next 14-1/2 months. That was quite a ride last time. 

3. It’s a little too early to get worried that Fabulous Donny Trump is in striking distance of Hillary Clinton, as a new CNN/ORC poll reports. I don’t doubt the poll. I just doubt that people are seriously thinking about how they’ll vote more than a year from now. It’s August 2015. These polls will be more to think about when it’s August 2016. 

4. That doesn’t mean that anyone who cherishes Western civilization shouldn’t be making sure that Fabulous Donny Trump’s message gets rejected resoundingly. Big time. I don’t want see this pond scum get even a moral victory, because there’s nothing moral about him.

That starts with making sure that voter registration begins now, and is thorough. That means that African-Americans, Hispanics, Asians and women need to secure their voting privileges at the soonest possible moment. That means accelerating the fight against these godawful voter ID laws aimed at disenfranchising people of humble means and circumstances.

If enough people who know how to walk and chew gum at the same time vote, there’s no way Trump or most of the other jokes being tossed up by the Republicans can win.

But if they don’t vote, that would be its own form of stupidity, turning the reins of the world’s greatest democracy to people who seem uninterested in preserving it.